i woke her up to tell her.. she said sorry more than half a sleep.

gues i can sleep...

it's 1235am..

.. and I am playing Avril Lavigne - sk8er boy over and over and over.. little louder but not too much. I am gonna wake her up. I am in freaking soo much pain at the bottom of my foot. I came home after IHOP and after I leave the bathroom there are NO LIGHTS on in the house. Remind you, I have been doing this for a long time... after I come home. So, I am bare foot.. and I steped on something sooo sharp I screamed and started fking cry so hard that I was lossing my breath. And what does she do.. NOTHING.. I hear her moving around in her bed. SHE made me hurt like this and didnt even ask what was wrong. YEAH!! She was throwing stuff in my bedroom door way. And one was a top to a rubber made thingy. It was upside down so the sharp plastic thingy was right on my foot. Its been ten mins and I still have dark lines... it hurts!! Why does she do things like this?? I saw that she put my two fish right by the tv again. We already went through this.. the tank can *already did* link. Does she want the TV to go out again?? Oohh my, for the tv to never come on again in the livingroom. I hate when she plays this game.

I will always love her and care about her.... sometimes she really doesnt think.. or is mad / upset at me and getting bad for some reason. I guess I'll take all my personail stuff from the livingroom/ kitchen... backroom. For heaven bit that I have stuff there.

grr now i am too upset to sleep

Today...

not feeling the best.. feeling kinda of depressed tonight... just not feeling myself. On my drive home from work.. it felt like I didnt even drive home.. that somehow me and my car just pulledup into the driveway on its own. I am hearing from my mom that I am forgetting things. I am NOT the type of person to forget things. Its just not part of who I am. I guess all this stress has started taking a toll on me.

Now, going to go try to relax in a hot bubblebath... i havent done that in a few days. I am starting to forget about myself.. start snapping at best friend... not dealing for rejection... somehow life has been pushing the hard life on me in the last few days.